Wednesday, January 13, 2010

Hair Enough

Hair. Why do we like it so much? When it's beautiful it's really beautiful. It glides on the wind and shines in the sun if it's long. It flows with great lines and flatters a persons' face if it's short. I've decided when I go to heaven I will ask God to have thick, naturally gorgeous hair like Penelope Cruz or Omar Spence (he's a guy I know in Santa Cruz). But achieving beautiful hair is such a pain if it's not a God-given gift! People with naturally straight or wavy hair are absolutely blessed as long as it's thick enough. But if they have fine hair they spend hours making it look thicker. And if they have thick hair they spend hours making it look thinner!

In fact, unless you have naturally manageable, medium thick straight or wavy hair, in a decent color, you have to do some of the following: Straightening, body-waving, teasing, curling, weaving, extensions, coloring, shaving, thinning, layering, blow-drying, hi-lights, lo-lights, and spiral perming. And that doesn't count hair creams, oils, mousses, gels, lacquers, and sprays that make your hair stay in place like a helmet.

Then, after using all those hair-products, you go out into wind or rain and it destroys every carefully blow-dried hair on your head in minutes!!! On a foggy day, my hair sticks to my head like a unitard. And when I had a perm, it would form curls tighter than a gold-digger's hand on her boyfriend's wallet. Indeed, I would wake up every morning to find my hair in a new shape. My child, who pointed at clouds and saw shapes of animals would point at my hair and say: "Horsey?" What can I say? To have a mane is a pain.

Why do we keep on doing this? To look attractive. Which I'm all for, except--it takes so much time to look good. People, don't we have better things to do? Men have the right idea--just shave your head. Unless of course you have a misshapen head. That looks really bad. If a guy's head looks like a ski slope he should NOT shave his head. If I shaved my head, I would look like the cherry on top of a sundae. Oh! Forget that idea...

So, whether you have big hair or no hair, a bob or a mullet, take heart. When we're in heaven I believe we will all be issued perfect hair. I don't know what that looks like, but I just know it won't be as much trouble as what we have now. God willing.

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